The $5000 Visual Orgasm.

My lack of recent blogs is primarily due to an important project of mine that was completed last weekend. The project was, essentially, a $5000 visual orgasm. I have no photographic record of this event, a photo or a film wouldn't do it justice.

You'll just have to take my word for it. However, I'm still a little blown away by the success of the project, so I'm a little lost for words. You'll just have to use your imagination.

The following are some basic instructions on how you can do the same.

Basic Requirements:

• $5000
• 1 Month Preparation Time
• 3000 Clear Fairy lights
• $400 worth of black and white checkered vinyl
• $200 rented tux
• $1500 Worth of Booze
• Ladies, Ladies, Ladies

Basic Process:

1. After 4 hours of rocking at a 1920s party, take one lady.
2. Place Lady in one facility lined with checkered vinyl and 3000 fairy lights.
3. Hoist lady on to your hip.
4. Spin.
5. Make sure you have had enough to drink so that your mind is working slow enough for you to become conscious of the focus changes of your eyes.
6. Adjust your eyes so that you are using a shallow depth of field.
7. Focus On the lady, letting the background fall out of focus, for as long as you can hold it.
8. Stop Spinning, head to the toilet and clean yourself up.